10 Ways to Disarm a Bully

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1. If you are getting bullied or you see someone else being bullied, always tell an adult. This can be a teacher, coach, or parent. Be truthful with them and let them know exactly what happened.

2. For every negative thing someone says about you, think three positive things about yourself.

3. Surround yourself with people who want to be friends with you because of who you are. These people will reinforce the positive feelings you have about yourself.

4. Be calm and understanding (yes I know that’s hard!) Here is a script to help you when someone says something mean or tries to put you down. Say to them: “I understand that’s how you feel about me and that’s okay because it’s your opinion. But I want you to know that I really like who I am and the things you are saying to me aren’t going to change how I feel about myself.” If they keep saying stuff to you, don’t lose your cool. Just keep saying that line and let them know they are wasting their time.

5. Understand that more often than not when someone bullies it’s because of a problem or insecurity they are dealing with. Bullying may be their way of acting out in order to make them feel better.

6. Stand up for someone when you see them being bullied. If you have a good relationship with the bully, ask them to stop. Or if you’re not comfortable with that then go up to the person being bullied and let them know you are there for them. Let them know all the great things they do that make them great. Be a person in their inner circle.

7. Every night before bed look in the mirror and say three things you are grateful for. Every morning look in the mirror and say out loud three goals you have set for that day and stay focused on them. When we are focused on our own achievements and things that make us happy, there is no time to worry about what others say about us.

8. If there is a specific area where the bully normally meets you, try to avoid the situation altogether or make sure you are with a couple friends. If the bully feels outnumbered or not around his/her friends they may stay calm.

9. Begin to develop an understanding of who you are, your values, and what you are willing to stand up for. Self assurance can be so helpful when dealing with a bully because their words won’t decrease the high value you place on yourself. Become who you want to be and don’t compare yourself to others.

10. One of the coolest things about life is that there is no one else like you. It is impossible that there is another person on this earth that is exactly like you. And that means you can do some pretty awesome things in this world. You have the ability to do things that no one else is even capable of doing because no one else is exactly you. The world needs you – the world needs your special gift that only you have.